Thursday, May 26, 2011

Bad mood

So, i am really sad right now. :(

Perhaps, even more than sad. I don't know what to do at the moment.

It is not me in the bad mood, don't get the wrong idea.

Sometimes, i don't know what i did that hurt others especially loved ones.

I try to treat everyone nicely, but i still hurt of what everyone did to me. I did many things to make people happy, i did it sincerely. But, i feel people don't appreciate what i do to them.

People can bully me around, people can do what they want on me, people can use me as much as they want, but they do not understands my feelings.

I don't understand a really small matter can turns into a big fight. i don't understand why people mix their emotion with their judgment.

What I really understand is that Allah has planned this for me. I need to be more patient. I don't blame anyone, i would rather to admit all of it my mistakes. I hope Allah sees my hardships, and he grants me rewards in the afterlife.

I didn't expect this to happen when you have plan all things perfectly, i already start to imagine all the nice things. Suddenly, someone turn into a heartless monster, rip apart your nice emotions.

That's how i feel right now.

Sorry for the emotional post, i don't know who to express my feelings anymore. I am extremely sad.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Glade, how refreshing.

Hello, im back!

After two years of struggling, I am now absolutely clueless, what to do now!!!!!

I seriously do not know what to talk about..........


hmm, a lot of strange things had happened to me these past two years. I am grateful to Allah because i am still alive and kicking :)

There are so much to share, but i dont know whether i would like to share them all. Probably, i would rather keep it inside than sharing. But, there's no fun in that. So, readers, expect the unexpected. MUAH!

I am still in the journey, to find an absolute answer for my absolute question, to complete myself with virtues, and to find happiness.

I hate to suffer but I believe Allah's decisions in everything that had happened to me are boulders that i have to move with my own arms. That's Life. and one thing for sure, change is constant. Be happy, or suffer with what u have.

I learned so much, and i believe there are so many things that i do not know. One thing for sure, I want to learn more. But i need motivation and physical strength to carry on. Ya Allah give me strength and guidance to learn the true knowledge from you.

Lastly, I am happy to know a lot of people. Friends, i am sorry for my mistakes, I know there are a lot of it. I am a man with a weird ego. Deep inside, I always for the best to you all. Sorry again.

Hope to see you guys in the next post. Cheerio. ;)

Back again,
Kamal Lazi